Your Introversion Fluctuates—Situational Differences Matter

Your introversion/extroversion level fluctuates—sometimes considerably—depending on the situation and circumstances you’re in.

Sometimes you turn into an extrovert—or so it must seem, both to you and others around you.

You’re more chatty and sociable than usual.

You have more energy in both your words and your behaviors.

You’re engaged more outwardly than normal with the people and/or activities around you.

What’s going on?

Nothing.

Don’t be fooled.

Just be aware that, perplexing as it might be, your tendency toward introversion isn’t static.

It fluctuates—minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day—depending on a whole host of factors.

The Person(s) You’re With

You’re going to be less introverted, for example—and (seemingly) more extroverted—among people you already know well, and people with whom you have something clearly in common.

Family members and close friends come immediately to mind here, but they’re not the only people I’m talking about.

In my own life, for example, I may not have seen my college roommate, Dave, for years—which was exactly the case a while back when I attended his father’s funeral.

But despite the time that had passed, I easily and happily slipped into reminiscing with him about the high jinks of yesteryear.

And Dave, in many ways an introvert himself, did the same, even though it was a tough day for him and his family.

The Topic or Activity

If you’re anything like me, you’ll be less introverted—and (seemingly) more extroverted—when the topic or activity or discussion you’re engaged in with others is clearly substantive in your eyes.

Will you be the life of the party during small talk?

Highly unlikely.

But the opposite may, and probably does, well occur when you know that the energy you’re putting into engaging with something or someone will have a worthy payoff.

Typically where we introverts are concerned, appealing depth and opportunities for learning both fit the bill.

So you just may find yourself shooting up your hand to ask a question or make a comment at that author lecture, for example.

Because if your purpose is worth the extroverting involved, you can and often do just go forth and do it.

The Atmosphere

You’re going to be less introverted—and (seemingly) more extroverted—in calm, relatively quiet, one-on-one interactions vs. free-for-all group interactions.

Suppose you set up an informational interview with someone you don’t know, and the two of you decide to meet at a peaceful, out-of-the-way coffee shop.

Will that alone turn you into Super Extrovert?

No, of course not.

But are you far more likely to be talkative and interactive in other ways than you would be in, say, a crowded bar, where you’re blinded by the lights and drowning in loud music and noise?

Yes.

Your Internal Battery

You’ll be less introverted—and (seemingly) more extroverted—when your internal battery (physical, mental, emotional) is fully charged or close to it; when you’ve gotten enough sleep, enough alone time, plenty of time to think, and all the other things we introverts need to be healthy and happy in life.

When your battery is dead or near dead, on the other hand, you’ll probably be even less extroverted—and (seemingly) more introverted—than you typically are.

One night a few years ago, as I was driving from the Green Bay, Wisconsin, area back to my home in the Minneapolis suburbs, I noticed that my car’s headlights were getting dimmer … and dimmer … and dimmer as the miles passed.

The car’s alternator was going bad, and I knew I had only so much time and distance before I would stall out to a complete stop.

I almost made it. But I came up about 30 miles short. (Luckily I was rescued by a passing trucker.)

That incident, though, which has stuck with me all these years, perfectly symbolizes what it is and will be like for you as an introvert when your internal battery is not fully charged.

And when it is.